Edmonton

The Interview Project 13: Paul J. Blinov


Photo by Madeline Smith

BIONOV:

“Paul works as an editor at Vue Weekly, where he gets to talk about arts and music and film and other such things that he likes to talk about. He also performs make-em-ups with Rapid Fire Theatre. Paul grew up in noted oiltown Fort McMurray, where the streets were paved with viscous bitumen. Maybe one day he’ll finish his university degree. Maybe.”

Science fact: Paul Blinov is actually three people. Born ‘The Blinov Triplets’, Pauls one through three are Edmonton’s best kept secret. That is until now…

Paul 1, the shy one, is an editor at Vue Weekly. You rarely see him in daylight, but when you do he has his computer and is surrounded by various stacks of mismatched paper piles. You will know it is him because he can be heard whispering, “Descartes was totes eleemosynary.” His worst habit is calling everyone ‘Dog’. Even cats.

Paul 2,the exploding one, is a madcap riff rapper for the Rapid Fire Theatre make ’em up team. This one time he said something super funny and everyone laughed except for this one guy but then people explained it to him and then he laughed and everything was right in the world. But, Paul 2 has a dirty secret: Bee racism.

Paul 3, the scientist, can be found at various imbibing establishments pulling his shirt over his head and slapping his stomach. Not a lot is known about Paul 3, but rumour has it that he could walk into the woods hungry and naked, and a week later walk out fully clothed, well fed and drunk.

ANSWERPANTS:

If you would give yourself a nickname what would it be?

This guy right here.

If you could switch one body part with anyone else in the world living or dead, who and what would it be?

Fred Astaire’s dancin’ feet.

In five words, describe your most uncomfortable dream.

Hit ground then wake up.

What is your favourite word?

Butts.

What does that word smell like?

Butts. I regret my choice of favourite word.

What is your spirit animal?

a zebra with wings. And tank-tread legs.

If ghosts existed, would you want to meet one? If so, what would you ask it?

Definitely would. I’d ask about THE GREAT BEYOND so I could stop worrying about the afterlife. Or amp up my worrying about the afterlife, depending on the answer.

If you could share a bottle of alcohol with anyone who has ever existed, who would it be and what would you drink?

Martinis with F Scott Fitzgerald. A whole bottle of Martinis.

What would you rather have as a pet: A dragon, a unicorn Pegasus or Ezra Levant?

Dragon. Anyone see Dragonheart? Yeah. It’d be just like that, right down to the Connery voice and choppy CGI.

Finally, if you could live your life over again with guaranteed success, what would you do?

Learn music, play in a sweet band.

 

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